The Blessing
~~ Part 5 ~~
After tucking Teresa in her bed, Lou went outside to the courtyard to talk to Jeremiah. Lou knew Jeremiah had issues with Kid, but now she knew why and she had to convince him that what Kid had done was for the best. She found him sitting under a tree and she sat next to him placing her coat around him.
"It's cold out; you should've worn your coat. I can't have you gettin' sick on me now, can I? Jeremiah, you know what you did today is wrong, don't you? Are you ready to talk about it?"
"Why did you lie to me and say our father was dead?"
"Well Jeremiah, things were complicated. I promised our mother on her death bed that I would make sure you and Teresa knew that our father had been a wonderful man who loved us very much. She didn't want you growin' up knowin' what I knew."
"I use to dream about a man who was always nice to me," Jeremiah started. "I didn't know it was our father, though, until he came for us. I was so angry at you when I found out you had lied, and then you continued to lie to us."
"Jeremiah, I'm going to talk to you like you're an adult, OK?" he nodded. "How much do you remember from when he lived with us?"
"Not much. I remembered him always tellin' people what to do and where to go, but I remembered how he would always play with me... or put me on his shoulders as he walked around the house, and show me stuff... and I remember how he would always give me a piece of sweet candy."
"Is that all?"
"It's been so long I don't remember what's real and what my dreams were."
"Well sometimes that happens. You block out the bad things that have happened to you so you don't remember them. But they always have a way of comin' back..." she paused wondering how much she should tell Jeremiah.
"Did you do that?" He asked looking at his sister for the first time since they started talking. When she nodded he continued, "Was it because of what he did to you?"
Lou sighed. "That and some other things; awful things that happened to when I left here."
"Awful things Kid did to you?"
"Jeremiah, Kid has never done anything awful to me. He is in no way like our father. He has always been there when I needed him. When those things that I'd hidden came back, he listened, helped me get through the pain."
"But he killed him. How can you say he's never done anything awful to you?"
"Jeremiah, things happened so fast that day, I don't think you remember everything. He was threatenin' to kill Jimmy and to take you from me. He wanted me to leave you there. He was gonna shoot me. Kid had no other choice. He was protectin' us."
"Why didn't you leave me there? I would've had my father and not had to live in this stupid place. You and Teresa could have stayed and we could've been a family again."
Lou finally realized that even though Jeremiah was becoming a man, he wasn't yet ready to face many adult things. Still he needed to know the whole truth. "Jeremiah, remember when he made you watch that man gettin' whipped?" Jeremiah nodded. "That was the kind of man he was. If somebody didn't do what he wanted, or if they said the wrong thing, he would hurt them. I couldn't leave you with a man like that. You would have grown up the same way."
"How do you know?" Jeremiah was getting defensive.
"Because that's what happens when you grow up in that kind of place. You learn by example. You may not remember, but he used to beat us; Me, ma, even Teresa."
"I don't remember him ever beatin' me. And Teresa was too small, he'd never do that."
"Jeremiah, you were so young. You were barely no longer a baby yourself when we left."
"I was not."
"Yes you were. I was eleven, you were almost four and Teresa was only a couple of months old. He never hit you because you were his son."
"Is that why we left?" Lou nodded. Jeremiah jumped up. "I don't believe you! He would never have hurt us, he loved us!" He ran back inside.
Lou sighed. She thought things were going well and that Jeremiah had begun to understand why Kid had had no choice. She knew better than to go after Jeremiah. He was so much like her when it came to anger; she knew the best thing was to let him be. She'd try again in the morning.